Tuesday, May 14, 2013

Driven

I've felt driven, lately, to get some things out of my head.  These things are ugly, these things hurt me.  I think that if these things are on a page, perhaps they will stop hurting me.  Simple concept, and since no one reads this anyway ... why the hell not here.  I plan to start posting pictures of my crafty projects, theater junk, and my nails again pretty soon too, but this ugliness will be scattered within.  This is my space, right?  I can write about whatever I want, right?

I figure I'll just start from the beginning.


My first memories:

I was born August 6, 1979 in Miami, Fla at Jackson Memorial Hospital.  I only know this is the truth because I have the birth certificate that lists city and state, and I've googled the hospital to make sure it's a real place.  People say that very young children don't remember things, but I'm here to tell you that they do.  I left Miami probably before my 3rd birthday, and I remember 3 things.

1) What the apartment complex I lived in looked like.  It was white/cream stucco with brown wood crossbeams outlining focal points, to make it look fancy I guess.  It also had a pool.  I know I spent a lot of time there.  I have a memory of running through the grass from our apartment door toward the pool.  I imagine, rather, I hope that my mom or dad was close behind.

2) I remember my dad giving me alcohol and cigarettes in that apartment.  The specific memory is a scene where I approach my dad, who is on the couch with a drink in one hand and a cigarette in the other, begging to have some of what he is having.  I remember tasting the drink, but I do not remember what it tasted like or whether I liked it or not.  Then I remember his laughter as he held the cigarette up to my lips.  I took a big breath and blew as hard as I could.  Thankfully, toddlers do not understand the mechanics of smoking, so rather than coughing and choking on smoke, the cherry flew from the end of the cigarette and landed in my dad's lap.  I remember his reaction.  He wasn't mad.  He laughed.  My dad always laughed, even when we argued.  I don't think he was ever really mad at me in my life.  This, however, is not a romantic picture of my father ... see: next memory.

This is where baby's first memories get really ugly, and if you are not the type of reader who cares to read about, or can handle stories about domestic violence, I recommend you stop reading now.

3) This memory starts kind of in the middle of an event.  I don't remember how it started.  I am in my parents' bed, and they are screaming at one another.  I am crying and asking them to stop yelling.  Then the blows start.  I don't remember who threw the first punch, but both of them threw punches.  The main difference was that my mom was naked and my father was not.  I don't remember what they were saying, just the noise of the yelling, the hitting, the struggle, the fear, and my cries "Please mommy!  Please daddy!  Please stop it!!"  I don't remember how long it persisted, or how it stopped, but at some point it did.  The hitting stopped, my father disappeared and my naked, bloody mother crawled into the bed where I hid, terrified, in the sheets, and hugged me.  She said something that I can no longer remember.  Maybe a reassurance that everything would be ok ... 

So that's Miami.

~raz

Thursday, June 9, 2011

Sandy's picnic quilt top


Sandy's picnic quilt top, originally uploaded by razberiswrl.

Sandy's picnic quilt top

Sunday, May 22, 2011

Just sharing a sew along/quilt along that excites me!!

As a budding quilter and sewer in general, I am constantly reading about techniques and patterns to try out. I don't have the confidence to try much of it out on my own though. :( So, when I heard about the We Can Do It! Skill Builder Sampler project over at Sewn by Leila, my eyes lit up. I'm definitely all in! It's really nice to tackle a project with a group of people that are ready to support you (or suffer with you, as the case may be, LOL!), and it's a cool feeling when you are able to support others with your skillful knowledge and advice.


So, check it out and join in!

We Can Do It! Skill Builder Sampler

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Petites Color Fever Candy Green and Black Diamond

There's an unadvertised clearance happening on certain Petites and CQ polishes at Rite-Aid. They aren't marked in any way, but they are ringing up at 99 cents instead of the usual 3.99. Both Candy Green and Black Diamond are part of the clearance. I picked up a couple others, which I can't remember the names ... I'm sure I'll be showing them off here in the near future. :) To find out what other polishes are included, you can head over to this post on Nouveau Cheap!


Candy Green


Petites Color Fever Candy Green


Petites Color Fever Candy Green


These pictures were taken after 3 or 4 days of wear! I was skeptical of this brand initially ... it seemed kind of pricy for a no name type of brand and only .25 oz, ya know? But I'll do just about anything for a dollar, LOL! So, at only 99 cents, I was all about it. Since I've been having a hell of a time with staining, I used 1 coat Instant Artificials, 1 coat Barielle Camo, and 1 coat of a really pale pink creme by Sinful Colors that I can't remember the name of under 2 coats of Candy Green, topped with Seche Vite. It dried really thin and fast considering there were 6 layers. You know how polish stays squishy underneath even though it's dry on top for hours and hours? Well this didn't do that. And talk about staying power ... I wore it for another couple of days after these pics were taken. My only complaint is that under low light, Candy Green looks a tad frosty. Overall though, this one is a total WIN for the money.


Black Diamond



Petites Color Fever Black Diamond
Overcast daylight

Petites Color Fever Black Diamond
Ott Bulb

Petites Color Fever Black Diamond
Ott Bulb

Petites Color Fever Black Diamond
Lamp Light

Petites Color Fever Black Diamond
Lamp Light

Petites Color Fever Black Diamond
Lamp Light

It sure is hard to coax the holo out of this one! And of course, I had to file my nails waaaay down due to FOUR breaks at the quick. >:( *grumble grumble* Oh well. I prefer dark polish on shorter nails anyway. This is 2 coats of Black Diamond over 1 coat Nail Tek Foundation II. No top coat, and I was being impatient so I decided not to use an underwear coat (holos don't usually stain in my experience either, so I wasn't as worried). In most light, Black Diamond looks like the first picture, a charcoal polish with silver shimmer. However, when the light hits it just right, it's just a charmer! I like a *wham! pow!* polish as much as anyone else, but sometimes I just want subtlety. Black Diamond really delivers in this department. It applied smooth and even, opaque in 2 thin coats and dried really fast. I do prefer a little more shine, but top coats have a habit of killing the holographic effect, so I left it off this time. Another total WIN. This is by far my favorite "black with a little sumfin sumfin" so far (and I have several!). Go buy this!! I'll be hunting down a back up for sure.

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Recently ... (pic heavy)

Once again, I have neglected this space. So here are some of the things I've been playing with lately. :)

Nails:

Crackle! Maybelline Firefly from the 2011 spring collex with the white China Glaze crackle over top. I loved this.

China Glaze Lighning Bolt over Maybelline Firefly

I won the OPI FB giveaway!

My OPI winnings

And tried Cheyenne Pepper

GEDC0777

Tried out a new Jesse's Girl polish, Glee. It's beautiful but stained the CRAP out of my nails and skin. :(

Jesse's Girl Glee


Thought I found a HTF Hard Candy polish, but it ended up just being mislabeled. :( It's not actually Zombie.

Hard Candy Zombie


Tried out one of my 3 free Zoyas. Miley is seriously beautiful.

Zoya Miley lamp light


Made a fun franken for an awesome friend. It's called My Sour Valentine.

My Sour Valentine Franken



Quilting:

I have FINISHED my very first quilt thanks to the That Girl ... That Quilt Along!!

My dog always gets in the way when I try to take pictures of it, LOL!

That Girl That Quilt Along progress


I joined the 3x6 mini quilting bee block swap and completed the blocks for my hive. So fun! Here are the blocks I made:

3x6 1stQ hive 10

3x6 1stQ hive 10

3x6 1stQ hive 10

3x6 1stQ hive 10

3x6 1stQ hive 10

3x6 1stQ hive 10


Crafty: I've been working on test products for my upcoming etsy store grand opening! No pics of this stuff at this time ... ;)


The Jr. production of God Spell at the Landis Theater wrapped in February. Here's a pic of Miss M that is just so unbelievably fantastic in my humble opinion. :D

The Divine Miss M in God Spell

She wasn't cast in the current production, which is Wizard of Oz, however she will be part of the stage crew with her brothers. Fun fun! Mommy (me, lol) is auditioning for a role in Cabaret tonight. Here's to breaking legs!!



And that's about it I guess! Have a great day!

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Kick ass Misa giveaway at Also Known As ...

Everyone can receive up to 10 entries!! The polishes are HOT too!!


Kelliegonzo giveaway


Aaaand, if I did this right, the pic should link you right to the giveaway. If not, well ... how convenient ... Kellie has put her link right on her picture! HA!


Good luck to all who enter!

Saturday, January 15, 2011

Wowza! Crazy generous giveaway at Lucy & Norman!

Not one, but TWO jelly rolls, PLENTY of yardage for a quilt back AND yardage for binding!!! Head on over to Lucy & Norman to check it out and enter.

Friday, January 14, 2011

A couple Sally Hansen Xtreme Wears

I managed to get 6 of these for 50 cents each last week (incl Concrete shown in my last post). Here are Blue Icing and Golden Child.



Blue Icing is a frosty/pearly ice blue with holographic bar and regular glitter.

Sally Hansen Xtreme Wear Blue Icing
Sally Hansen Xtreme Wear Blue Icing


Something about this just doesn't work. I feel like the glitter should have been a separate top coat or something because after the 2nd coat dries, it looks like the glitter under from the first coat is a bumpy, festering mess. :( The color itself is actually really nice for a frosty sort of finish. There is a bare minimum of brush strokiness which is the major fault of a frost polish. Oh, this is actually 3 coats. I was hoping that maybe a 3rd thick coat AFTER the first 2 dried completely would hide the weird bumpiness, but it didn't. This bumpiness isn't like an ordinary glitter polish where top coat fixes the issue. It just really shows as a mar under the opaque finish of the polish. What the hell, it was only fitty cent.


Golden Child is exactly the same kind of polish, just gold instead of blue.

Sally Hansen Xtreme Wear Golden Child

Sally Hansen Xtreme Wear Golden Child

This is 2 coats (I used this one the other day, and decided to try the 3rd coat to see if it would solve the bumpy look problem with the blue). I think the visible nail line has to do with the lighting because I didn't notice it outside of these pics. I'm pretty bummed about this one because it's like the perfect freaking gold for my skin tone, but I won't end up wearing it because it's so damn bumpy and ucky looking. Blah.

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Hangin' with my gnomies and Sally Hansen Xtreme Wear Concrete

I made this little guy last night (pattern from the Doodle Stitch Along). I haven't embroidered since middle school, lol, so forgive me for looking a novice.

Doodle Stitch-along week one


I pretty much love him. I can't wait to see next week's pattern!


My current mani is Sally Hansen Xtreme Wear in Concrete. These pics are 1 coat over Nailtek II Foundation with 1 coat Seche Vite on top.


Sally Hansen xtreme wear Concrete

Sally Hansen xtreme wear Concrete


Concrete is a warm mauvey taupe creme. This mani really should have been 2 coats, but I was short on time, so 1 coat sufficed. To be completely honest, I didn't buy this polish because I liked it. I bought it because it was 50 cents after sale and coupon, lol! I'm glad I didn't pass it by though because it turns out I quite like it! I'm not crazy about the SH brush or formula, so I tend to pass by this brand a lot. Don't get me wrong, I REALLY like a wide brush, HOWEVER, the stem is also very wide, which leads to problems when swiping the brush against the bottle neck to remove excess polish. What ends up happening is that the stem doesn't make much contact with the bottle neck since it is too wide compared to the curve of the bottle opening, so as you are applying to the nail, excess polish is running down the stem of the brush. It's a real pain in the ass, lol. The formula is a little runny too, so pooling is an issue. This is also pretty slow to dry, even with a fast dry top coat. Overall, I guess it's worth the $3 retail price point (even though you can get better for less) because of the unique color. These are often discounted at drugstores though, so I can't imagine ever paying more than a buck fifty for one ... pair with a coupon, and at 50 cents, it was worth every penny! :-)

Friday, December 17, 2010

A finished (almost) quilt top! My first one!


Wonky quilt for Ayden, originally uploaded by razberiswrl.

I'm going to add another row, but essentially it's finished. Now to piece the back and figure out how the hell I'm going to quilt it!!